literature

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Deviation Actions

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Literature Text

1.
inexplicable things
that we sense
like wings fluttering
in the shadows

or chest rising with the effort
of feeling

crystal chandeliers
so fragile in the wind

shards of memory
piercing the stillness
and screams silenced
with agony

the lashes to our eyes
hurt and bleed

come again
and wound me

so close to breaking
I can see the cracks.
they widen
and begin to disintegrate

the holes patched
the pain "forgotten"
(as if things
like that can just go away)

I see light
cold and clear through dry eyelashes
whispers in the ink
and music that sings


2.
inexplicable things
darling and sweet
unmistakable
…and there

I see the light in your eyes
I hear your warm heart

I know your thoughts
…I feel you here

there it is
on the raven's wings:
happiness…
on the feathers of pain

I can see the black
far away

but always close
as a dream (nightmare)

I am not lost
I can see beauty
light is fun to watch…
dancing in the eddies

hands are warm
inviting and open
new for me and my still heart
who are you?

a new word is mine
never mine before
glass – fragile with color prisms:
happy.


3.
inexplicable things
so incomprehensible
and wrong
opposite and backwards

impossible to understand
I don't…

a paradox
brows furrowed

flashes and color
exploding
rampant, run wild
and be beautiful

yes or no?
stutter in silence

numb and trapped
words with no explanation

behind the scenes
a fairy (or elf?)
pulls the strings
marionette or voodoo doll?

highs and lows
intense beyond measure
tears and smiles
either or, or even together

what is this creature?
the piano plays on
rising notes
in question
inexplicable things
of inexcusable nature,
unidentifiable creature,
and unthinkable torture.

we three
illusive be
hiding identity
in mystery














What did I do right? wrong?
Anything unclear? Are the images understandable? Is there anything confusing?
Can you feel the emotions? What ones can you identify?
And...what are "the three"?


EDIT:

=DrippingWords was sweet enough to suggest and feature this as a DLD here: [link]! Thank you, my friend!:squee:



EDIT 7/14 Hear me read it here!:heart:
© 2013 - 2024 Ink-Singer
Comments32
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valleigh's avatar
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Overall
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Impact

I liked this poem, it was long and interesting, I would of made it a little shorter, but this wasn't a bad start at all.

You had a good idea, and you took the idea and did well with writing this, all the words and all, made it come together well, something people put all the right words in the wrong places, but you didn't.

You did well with the technique, and it made this poem turn out well, keep trying to change up all your new poems, always good to try to do new things.

This poem was interesting and does have a big impact, keep up the good work, the more i read the more I see you try to get better at what you do.